November 12th 2008

Are people too afraid to actually lay their heart on the line? Whatever it is, it really kills people. It makes them sit and think of everything they've done wrong or could've done better to stop this from happening. It makes people feel guilty and makes them feel like it's their entire fault. It makes them feel worthless, hopeless, unwanted. It crazy what one person, or a couple people can do to you. It hurts to get hurt, it's like getting the emotion sucked out of you and feeling like you're never going to get it back. It takes the color out of your life, all you see is black white and shades of gray. You're afraid to lay your heart out again because you're scared it's going to get thrown into traffic and left for road kill yet again. But I guess that's the kind of chances you have to take. You have to learn when to jump and when to stand your ground. You have to learn when to hold on or when to let go. Most of all you have to learn is it the real thing? Or is this all just a game? People change. Some people get scared and can't handle the change the people they love undergo. People judge people for their past mistakes, mistakes you would do anything to change. Everyone regrets something or wants something back. Sometimes, you get lucky and get that one thing back. Sometimes people don't realize how great their situation was until they left it. Sometimes people never get over the people they fall in love with. Sometimes, people get lucky and get a second chance. I guess I'm still waiting for that second chance. People make mistakes for a reason, we need to learn and grow from them. So don't tell me what I'm doing is wrong, let me figure it out myself. Don't let anyone control what you do, who you talk to, what you say or even how you dress. You are your own person and if they do not accept that then they have serious issues and they need to move on. Don't let anyone try to change you because there is someone out there who loves you for who you are and you just don't realize it yet. Always remember, if the one person you're with dosn't treat you right then don't stick around, RUN! Do not put up with any abuse because everyone is special and everyone deserves soneone who will care for them, not put them down constantly to feel better about themselves and to feel as though they have control over the relationship. Rely on yourself to make you happy, not other people because the smile you see today may not be there tomorrow.The world is yours. Really, you can do whatever you want in life. There are no limitations. Do what makes you happy and don't let anyone get in your way. Sometimes you have to step on some people to get exactly where you want to be. When you're there, don't forget about the people that got you there and the people that love you and you love back because if you end up forgetting that, you might just forget who you are or how you got there. You could forget you're morals and your boundaries, and become a whole different person. Be who you are and live you life the way you want it, not to other peoples expectations. I guess what I'm trying to say is let me be me and don't try to change me because I'm growing and I'm still young. I'm in no hurry to grow up, let me be sixteen. Love me for who I am and what I believe in, not the rumours you've heard about me or what you think you'll get out of being with me. I'm a person with feelings believe it or not. I can't always be strong. So maybe you should try to get to know me before you judge me or believe what you hear because I'm a completely different person. Everyone thinks they know someone until they actually sit down with that other person and have a conversation. And im not just saying myself, but there is a lot we dont know about a lot of people who we think we know and I think it's time to open our eyes and our hearts. A simple 'hey' and a smile goes a long way you know.